Top 10: Date Movies

The blissful early days of a relationship are a wondrous time of discovery and pent-up sexual energy that can leave you deliriously happy and flat broke. It doesn’t always have to be $200 meals, since staying in with a movie is one of the cheapest dates around. The success of that date, and how far you get with her afterward, depends largely on your choice of movie. Sorority House Massacre isn’t going to cut it, nor will anything too serious. And if you rent something overtly sexual, be prepared for two hours of extreme awkwardness.

It’s a veritable minefield, but we’re prepared to help you navigate through it. Perfect date movies should have something for both of you, with an attractive cast, romance, action, laughs, and maybe a tame sex scene. You can always cop out and go the safe route with something predictable (and atrocious) like You’ve Got Mail, but you’d be better off with one of these unique options. You’ll get high marks for originality and won’t have to put up with Meg Ryan. So sit back, snuggle up with your new girl and enjoy one of these top 10 unique date movies.

Number 10

Jerry Maguire - 1996

Back before he went completely insane, Tom Cruise was the biggest box-office star in Hollywood and the charisma and screen presence that allowed him to climb to this lofty position is on full display in this hybrid romantic comedy/sports movie. Directed by Cameron Crowe (Almost Famous, Singles), Jerry Maguire tells the tale of a ruthless sports agent who suffers a sudden change of heart and turns his back on the money-crazed industry.

3 reasons she’ll love it: Jerry Maguire has the three pillars of success as far as date movies are concerned: Pre-crazy Tom Cruise, it’s a love story in which the average-looking girl gets the “hot” guy and kid so cute you’ll want to punt him.

3 reasons you’ll love it: There’s great sports action, tons of fantastic cameos (from Glenn Fry to Troy Aikman) and a surprisingly hot sex scene with Kelly Preston (all date movies should be so blessed).

Number 9

The Apartment - 1960

Jack Lemmon, Shirley MacLaine

You can advance your career through hard work, long hours and ample ass-kissing. Or, if you are Bud Baxter (Lemmon) in this classic among 1960s date movies, you just let all the executives use your Manhattan apartment for their illicit trysts. That’s the premise of this long-forgotten comedy from legendary director Billy Wilder (Some Like It Hot). Things go along swimmingly for Bud until he falls for the mistress of his boss -- which understandably makes things awkward.

3 reasons she’ll love it: The hilarious backward attitudes toward women will make her happy for today’s more progressive mindset, she’ll giggle at the style -- handsome men in thin ties, and Shirley MacLaine’s ditzy, whorish character will make her feel morally superior.

3 reasons you’ll love it: Lemmon’s sad-sack, faceless corporate drone will let you look at your predicament and remember that it could always be worse. The Apartment provides a look at the good old days when cigarettes were smoked in your office and women were called “dames.” You’ll also earn major bonus points for introducing her to a hilarious silver-screen classic that helped shape the genre of date movies.

Number 8

Belle Epoque - 1992

Penelope Cruz, Miriam Díaz Aroca

Show off your cultured continental side and rent this 1994 Oscar-winner for Best Foreign Language Film. It tells the story of a Spanish soldier who deserts the army and ends up in a villa with an artist and his four serious hot Spanish daughters. Hmm, risk your life on the front lines or hang out with four farmer’s daughters? It’s sexy without being raunchy and funny without resorting to poop jokes -- just as all date movies should be.

3 reasons she’ll love it: Your date will love the gorgeous Spanish scenery, the sensual sex scenes and the cute guys with even cuter accents.

3 reasons you’ll love it: It’s basically a two-hour cinematic version of the age-old farmer’s daughter fantasy, when your date takes a pee break you can freeze-frame nude scenes of Penelope Cruz, and of course, there’s Penelope Cruz.

Number 7

About a Boy - 2002

Hugh Grant, Rachel Weisz



For many women, dating is really just a job interview for prospective fathers. So, your girl will undoubtedly be watching how you judge Hugh Grant’s character in this pleasant little flick. He starts off as a lazy, womanizing boy-toy, but after becoming an unlikely and unwilling surrogate father to a bastard child in this date movie bloodbath, he turns into a model adult man.

3 reasons she’ll love it: For once she gets to witness a man who can be changed for the better, the female lead isn’t a size zero with porcelain skin, and the cute, awkward lead boy.

3 reasons you’ll love it: You’ll envy Hugh Grant’s bachelor pad, enjoy the soundtrack (performed exclusively by Badly Drawn Boy), and Rachel Weisz.

Number 6

Mr. & Mrs. Smith - 2005

Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie



Make-up sex is just about the best kind of sex you can have. So, imagine how good the sex is between Brad Pitt's and Angelina Jolie’s characters after they spend 20 minutes trying to kill each other. That sexual tension, combined with many more phenomenal action sequences, make this one of the best date movies to come along in a long time. With an A-plus cast comes huge expectations, but even with that burden, director Doug Liman (Swingers, Jumper) delivers.

3 reasons she’ll love it: Your date will love the spectacularly decorated suburban home, the rare and empowering presence of a hit woman and, as usual, Brad Pitt.

3 reasons you’ll love it: You’ll love the coolest weapon arsenal seen on the screen in some time, the amazing car chase (between BMWs and a minivan) and, as usual, Angelina Jolie.

Number 5

Say Anything - 1989

John Cusack, Ione Skye

Lloyd Dobler (John Cusack) did more than just bag the hot popular rich chick while wearing a trench coat; he also gave hope to helpless nerds the world over. And this '80s date-movie classic tells the tale of how he did just that. You can’t help but cheer for Dobler because not only is he the consummate underdog, he’s also a father figure to his little brother and boasts the coolest ghetto blaster in movie history. So, to see him win in the end will melt even the coldest heart.

3 reasons she’ll love it: No woman can resist the young and charming John Cusack. She'll also like the endearing father/daughter relationship and the hilarious ‘80s fashion.

3 reasons you’ll love it: You’ll like the hot chicks wearing hilarious ‘80s fashion, the retro soundtrack and the sport of the future.

Number 4

Intolerable Cruelty - 2003

George Clooney, Catherine Zeta-Jones




Not all date movies have to come slathered in cheesy romance, especially when they star two of the hottest actors this side of 2000. George Clooney plays a hardened divorce lawyer who falls for a client (Catherine Zeta-Jones) and tries like mad to get in her legal briefs. It’s filled with cheating husbands and gold-digging ex-wives, which could make you ask why it belongs on this list. Well, aside from being one of the wittiest romantic comedies out there, it also captures the same flirtatious energy both you and your friend are hopefully feeling on your movie-watching date.

3 reasons she’ll love it: Obviously, she’ll like People magazine’s twice-named Sexiest Man Alive, George Clooney, a female character that can go toe-to-toe with the slimiest lawyers and con artists out there, and all the cheating men who get their comeuppance.

3 reasons you’ll love it: You’ll love it for the rare and dignified beauty of Catherine Zeta-Jones, the Coen Brothers’ eclectic style and an asthmatic contract killer.

Number 3

The Wedding Singer - 1998

Adam Sandler, Drew Barrymore



Usually, lead singers of wedding bands are the kinds of guys you’d like to drag out behind the banquet hall and strangle with a microphone cord, but Adam Sandler’s Robbie is entertaining enough to avoid such a fate. He and a less-annoying-than-usual Drew Barrymore star in this charming romantic comedy and play star-crossed lovers who find themselves engaged to the wrong people. Sandler and Barrymore stick to the moral high ground and wait for the inevitable happy ending to begin their relationship.

3 reasons she’ll love it: She’ll revel in an unrivaled ‘80s soundtrack, be thankful her fingers will never get tangled in a mullet and laugh at the horrific bridesmaid dresses.

3 reasons you’ll love it: Guys will appreciate the realistic portrayal of life as a freshly dumped dude, like the hot girls (if you consider girls with feathered hair and neon sweatshirts hot), and love the fact that the movie ends after 95 minutes.

Number 2

Bull Durham - 1988

Kevin Costner, Susan Sarandon



Sports movies usually make good date movies, thanks in part to their combination of action and romance. This baseball flick, however, adds some spicy sex and above-average dialogue to elevate it into the classic realm. Kevin Costner plays a career minor league catcher called on to mentor a dim yet talented prospect (Tim Robbins). Along the way, the two fight over the affections of Annie Savoy (Susan Sarandon), a townie with a thing for ballplayers.

3 reasons she’ll love it: Your girl will like the liberal female lead who’ll make her feel empowered (which could make things very interesting if things get a bit frisky), the cute baseball players, and Kevin Costner’s list of the important things in life, which range from hanging curveballs to high fiber, and ends with an admiration of “long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days.”

3 reasons you’ll love it: You’ll chuckle at Nuke LaLoosh’s cliche-ridden interviews, but you’ll enjoy how the movie portrays life in the minor leagues, and the old-fashioned, dirt-on-your-uniform, pine-tar-in-your-hair baseball action.

Number 1

Hitch - 2005

Will Smith, Kevin James



There are life coaches, financial consultants, career counselors, and all other sorts of people willing to offer their services, but is there any help out there for a hapless dweeb with no clue about women? There is in this surprising rom-com, and it is in the form of a silky-smooth Will Smith who mentors Kevin James on the subtleties of dating in the new millennium. We mentioned that a good date movie should have laughs, and this film has a black book full of them.

3 reasons she’ll love it: She’ll like Will Smith doing his Will Smith thing, Kevin James’ attempt at dancing and the flick gives an inside look at the inner-workings of a man on the prowl.

3 reasons you’ll love it: You’ll like Eva Mendes, the truly valuable nuggets of dating advice from a master and Eva Mendes (no, that’s not a misprint).

date movie climax

How many first heavy-petting sessions have taken place on the couch with the soft flicker of a TV illuminating the groping couple as the DVD’s menu music plays in a continuous loop in the background? A movie at home is an ideal date -- it’s simple, cheap and easily transferable to second base and beyond. It must be done correctly, however, and trying some of these 10 unique date movies will give you a fighting chance. The rest is up to you, stud.

7 Deadly Sins - Dating Advice for men and women

There are some classic mistake that women make when dealing with men. Some hurt you, some hurt him, some hurt the relationship. They happen so often, and with such great frequency, that you would think it was a secret. Well I’m here to burst that bubble and help you steer clear of these seven deadly sins. 1. Never sleep with your Ex Sleeping with your ex (boyfriend, husband, lover, etc.) is always a big mistake. Remember, there’s a reason why the two of you broke up in the first place. Engaging in such a raw passionate act with your ex will without a doubt stir up old feelings. The familiar comforts of his powerful arms, musky smell, and warm body will have you feeling like love all over again. But, is it really love? No! Sadly it’s merely lust, and comfort, and convenience. You’ll delude yourself into thinking things will work out this time. Surprisingly, you only remember the good times, and all the failings of the relationship elude your grasp. So avoid this mistake at all costs. It will only end in heart break, anger, and confusion, etc. 2. Faking An Orgasm Women of all ages fake orgasms. One of the most popular reasons given is to spare a man’s feelings. But is this honestly the reason why women are faking orgasm? In my humble opinion I believe this is a selfish and not a selfless act. You know how awkward it will be to turn to your man and tell him he’s not pleasing you sexually. Many men if you talk to them in a positive attitude will want to make sure you are satisfied. It’s really all in how you approach it. Also, it only hurts a man more to discover later that you’ve faked orgasms for a long period of time. Faking an orgasm actually trains the body into thinking it will not achieve orgasm at the end of a sexual encounter. In time this makes it increasingly difficult to reach the Big-O. So do yourself, and your man a favor. Speak up! Approach him with a loving and caring voice, and tell him what you like. Focus on the positive things, instead of telling him what he’s doing wrong. 3. Ditching Your Girlfriends For A New Beau How many of you are guilty of this, or have a friend who is? It’s a very bad habit. It’s not healthy for your relationship with your man and your friends. It’s good to have hobbies, interests, friends and time away from your man. Yes, it may be difficult, especially early in the relationship. But it’s for the best. Your friends miss you, and if you keep ditching them for men, they will soon cut you off. Yes, your friends will be there to support you when things are bad, but if you avoid them during the good times they will easily become angry. No one wants to get always get the short end of the stick. Besides, the time apart from your man is healthy. It lets you focus on other things, gives you a recharge, and gives you something to talk about when you see him again. 4. "Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!” If Interrogation is your middle name you may have a problem. There’s a time and place for questions. On the first date, the last thing anyone wants is to feel like it’s an interview. You’re supposed to be having fun! If you start talking about long committed relationship and making plans together after one week, it’s too soon. If you start talking about marriage, kids, and where you want to raise your family after only a few months, it’s too soon. There’s so much to learn about your man if you only listen and show interest in what he likes and talks about. So slow down on the questions. Listen, relax, and have fun! 5. “We” instead of “me” Men enjoy their freedom. There’s a reason why men are cautious and careful about jumping into a relationship. He wants a woman who is going to respect his needs and his freedom. It’s healthy and highly recommended to let a man have some space, or a night out with the boys. Using “we” is something that takes time. Sure it’s fun to make plans to spend time together. But have you considered his interest, and his plans? Making plans for you and your new boyfriend to go to a wedding, big mistake. Telling him about your friend’s wedding, and asking if he’d like to be your date, much better. But again, be weary of bringing up weddings too early in the relationship. You have to feel a man out, and listen to who he is. If you rush making plans for each other, he will feel trapped and want to leave. But if you do it gradually and over time, it will show you are interested in him and enjoy being with him. 6. Loosing Your Identity He loves the band “Muse”, the Packers, and muscle cars. So you begin neglecting your own hobbies and interests in order to dive into his. This is a big mistake too many women are guilty of. It’s great that you want to share in your man’s interests, but not at the cost of your own identity. Your interests have help create who you are as a woman. You should never give up who you are for a man. If you truly wish to share in his interests, don’t force it. In time, the longer you are together, the more you will learn. Let things come naturally. 7. Unrealistic Expectations No one can live up to a high list of expectations. Why is it the best advice to give a man is to have no expectations and simple enjoy having a good time with a woman? But, the same advice doesn’t appear to apply to women’s expectations on men. Often you may find yourself missing out on a great opportunity. No one is perfect. If your expectations are too high then you may end up single forever. If they are too low, you’ll find yourself with horrible men who don’t appreciate you. Expectations can be so powerful that some men may not approach you, assuming that you have high expectations for a man you date. Spend some time investigating who you really are as a person and a woman. What do you absolutely need, and what do you want. Remember, we can’t truly know, understand, and appreciate others, until we know ourselves.

Tips on Romancing women - Dating advices for men

This week's Q&A focuses on how to tease her without being a jerk, and how to keep the romance alive without seeming like a Wussy. David DeAngelo, author of Double Your Dating: What Every Man Should Know About How To Be Successful With Women, has your answers.

How can I use your Cocky & Funny technique without going too far and turning into a real jerk? Sometimes when I tease a woman she calls me an a**hole.
Remember: There's a difference between being called an a**hole by a woman and actually being one.

If you're just being Cocky & Funny, teasing, being a challenge, etc. while being considerate, kind, physically stimulating (a-hem), and other "nice" things, and a woman calls you an "a**hole" then say, "I'm really glad you like it!" Turn it into something Cocky & Funny.

The key is to not actually become a mean, abusive guy.

Women love the challenge, but they don't like the abuse from bad guys.

Give them the positive without the negative, and you’ll be fine.

If a guy goes too far with Cocky & Funny, what’s the best way for him to recover?
This is a great question...

Often, when you're first learning how to use the Cocky & Funny attitude, you'll go overboard and make the mistake of saying something that's purely arrogant... but not funny.

No problem.

You have a few choices:

1- Say something afterwards that's funny that makes the original comment funny.

2- Say, "Oh, I'm just teasing," or give her a sly smile to let her know you were kidding.

3- Laugh at your own comment to signal that it was a joke and not to be taken seriously.

Of course, you don't want to tell a woman that you're just teasing or laugh at your own comments too often, because you'll look like a schmuck if you do.

The key to recovering is not letting the fact that you went overboard throw you off.
If she gets a little upset, just be cool and calm about the situation, and get back on track with more humor.

And don't worry about it; you're learning a skill that will increase your success with women forever, so it's OK to make a few mistakes here and there while you're learning.

If you’re in a relationship with a girl, what’s the best way you can romance her without coming across like a Wussy?
OK, as you know I don't like to venture into the "relationship" realm, but I will make a comment here…

If you have been seeing a woman for awhile, and you really want to blow her mind, do several things that she likes all in one day or evening.

Take her to her favorite restaurant, give her a gift of her favorite flowers, wear the clothes that you know she likes, rub her shoulders, and, um... give her some good lovin'.

Romance is wonderful, as long as you don't overdo it and come across as a Wussy.
Focus all of the things that she likes into one small window, and good things will come of it.

Then don't do them again for awhile... at all.

She'll talk about that night forever, and she'll always be wondering when the next one will come...
reader’s question
First the success story: I have recently met a few 8.5-9.5s and have had so much luck with getting numbers and dates with the Cocky & Funny routine. In fact, my buddy who is a model came up for the weekend and he commented on how well I have come into my own and how I remind him of... him. He was usually the master of our group in getting the girls... he just had a way with it, but what I noticed with him is that he'd find a girl he'd like and get all Wuss- like. I tried to learn from him about the initial attraction, but could never really apply it.

Then I got your book and applied that and not only was I impressed with myself, but he was impressed with the way I've changed (I used to be a big, shy Wuss). I have learned that you don’t have to be the best-looking guy in the world to attract the women you want. It’s all in the way you talk (slowly, and confidently), the way you compose yourself and the way you walk.

My question is: I met this girl who is a good 9-9.5. I was almost intimidated the first time we met, but I stuck to my guns and remembered your teachings. I was Cocky & Funny. I bust on her all the time, yet she seems a little standoffish. Although, when I talk to and go out with other girls, she immediately wants to go out (hang out, whatever). She'll comment on "I love how you joke with me" and when I tell her things like "Well thanks for flaking out on me the other night, you owe me anyway." She always says, " I owe you! I know." Then I always joke with her about being a flake and that she must be a blonde and she’s fooling everyone (she’s half black/half white with dark hair).

OK, well on to the question: What is this girl’s deal? I see her maybe two to three times every two weeks or so, and we usually hang out until the wee hours of the morning, and we always have fun. It seems like I see her more when I turn up two factors: The "busting on her" factor, and the "not caring what you’re doing right now… I’m out with this other girl" factor. In my experience, a girl is either into me, or she’s not... point blank. This girl is more flaky, and on and off more than anyone I've ever know.

Ken Oh
my comments
Well, congratulations. I know exactly how you feel... I love it that I can hang out with my guy friends who are "naturals" at meeting women and hold my own.

I'm about to push the boundaries of my normally rather politically correct way of talking about women by venturing a guess...

I'll bet you a hundred bucks that this girl is or has been either...

1- An exotic dancer
2- An escort of some kind
3- A model or actress

I know, I know... attractive women often are. But there's something about these "careers" that, in my personal experience, seems to lead to the exact kinds of flaky, wishy-washy, inconsistent behavior you're talking about.

I mean, she could also just be a dingbat. Let's not rule that out.

The reason you probably like this girl so much is because she isn't predictable.
I mean, you could have asked me anything here, and you chose to ask me about one particular situation with one particular girl.

That tells me that whatever she's doing is working, and it's probably worked all her life.

10: Ways To Be The Man Women Want - Dating advices and dating tips for men

Number 10

Learn to attract women by just being yourself

Many men feel an invisible barrier to becoming a man… and that barrier is magnified by the inability to attract women by just being yourself. The fact is, many of us have a “dark cloud” that follows us everywhere when we don’t have that special something that makes women want to be with us -- “for no reason at all, just because they enjoy being around you.” If a man is actually a boy on the inside, then he not only can’t see the path to fix the problem, but he also doesn’t even know that the path exists. But there IS a path -- believe me. Keep reading…

Number 9

Get “unstuck” and grow up

I believe that most of the people we refer to as “men” today are only called that because of their age and size; it has nothing to do with the deeper meaning of the word “man.” What happens when a man reaches a certain age, but doesn’t mature past a certain point in life? Or worse, what if some vital part of the maturation process that’s usually present in the external world isn’t there at a critical point in a man’s development… so that he winds up stuck at a certain psychological or emotional point? This is the problem most of us guys face: We were never shown the way to manhood, and now we have to figure it out for ourselves.

Number 8

It’s OK to be a man

When you try to fight your own nature, it will come back to bite you in the ass later, in a million ways. And when it comes back, it won’t be a simple drive to screw a woman’s brains out; it will be a complex web of neurotic thoughts, feelings and patterns that are very difficult to unwire. You must accept yourself, embrace the fact that you’re a man and have a man’s nature, then learn to observe all that happens -- from sexual impulses to killer instincts -- and harness the power from all of it. This is among the most important ways to be the man women want.

Number 7

Never follow the woman

Men often try to follow a woman who doesn’t want to lead, and when she doesn’t lead, the man tries to convince her to lead with questions and body language that seeks approval. She leads, he follows -- in fact, she isn’t even leading, but he tries to follow. This is a huge mistake. Instead, step up, be an man and LEAD. Pick a course and stay on it -- even though she is all over the map. Let her reorient her body, behavior and moods to yours. Don’t backpedal, change, explain yourself, or ever try to get her to lead. She may resist at first, but she’ll love you for it in the end.

Number 6

Take personal responsibility

Take personal responsibility for yourself, your thoughts and your situation. Learn to see how the choices you’ve made have led you to where you are. Refuse to be a victim -- and refuse to give anyone the power to take your joy from you. Women find this type of self-responsible guy very attractive.

Number 5

Stop giving away your power

Most men give away their power to women to get approval. The problem is that this is not one of the ways to be the man women want. That’s why those few men who choose to keep their power are so powerfully attractive to women. What’s the lesson here?Never give away your power to get on a woman’s “good side.” If feels like it should work, but it NEVER does.

Number 4

“Man up” about your insecurities

Instead of hiding the things that you’re insecure about, feature them until you’re over them. How? Practice making cocky jokes about them when you first meet a woman and are flirting. Say something like, “This is never going to work out; you’re not good at arguing and I overcompensate for being short by acting arrogant... so we’d always argue, and I’d always win.”

Number 3

Stop needing a woman to need you

Many men feel “left out” if a woman wants to do something alone or with friends other than him. Get over the automatic-response feeling of jealousy, loss or sadness if she’s looking forward to enjoying doing something without you. Cultivate your ability to want to do things without her and truly enjoy them. These are especially important when it comes to women who are new in your life. It’s mature to allow others to live their lives and enjoy experiences without you and without you feeling that you’re losing something. The other side of this coin is to allow yourself to live your life and enjoy your own experiences -- without needing others to validate your enjoyment. Get a life man! And experience this as one of the best ways to be the man women want.

Number 2

Give up “girly man” behavior

Becoming a “Man’s Man” means giving up a lot of things that most men hold on to. It means giving up throwing emotional tantrums to get attention. It means giving up correcting people because you need to feel important. It means no longer disagreeing with people to show your superiority or being a “know it all” so people will give you approval. It means you must stop saying and doing things to win attention and approval, instead of coming from a place of wanting to add value and genuinely help a situation. Give up these immature patterns that most guys get sucked into, and you’ll be well on your way to becoming the type of man who naturally attracts women.

Number 1

Constantly grow yourself to get an unfair advantage

Becoming the type of masculine, complete man that women are uncontrollably attracted to is a process. As soon as you think you’ve arrived, you see there’s another higher level on the horizon. Sadly, most guys never get started on this journey to true adulthood. They remain little boys trapped inside a man’s body. But if you want to be a man who has a continual stream of women in his life -- or one high-quality woman that you can keep for as long as you like -- then commit, right now, to do whatever it takes to grow yourself into the man you were born to become.

Dating tips and Dating advices: 10 Signs It’s Time To Break Up

In any relationship, there are good days and there are bad days. For instance, you might want to do something that your partner is completely opposed to, or she might want to go shopping for the apartment when all you want to do is stay at home and relax with the game or a movie. This is part and parcel of being one half of a couple.

Now and again, however, your differences might become more serious and can lead to a breakup. There are signs of looming trouble, and when they are seen with some frequency, it might be time to cut your losses and end the relationship. Knowing what these breakup signs are can help you avoid wasting any more time in a dead-end relationship.
Number 10
Lack of contact
When you first got together with your other half, you couldn't stop contacting each other. Whether it was on the phone, via text messaging or using e-mail and other online messenger systems, speaking to each other almost every hour was the norm. Now, however, you can’t even be bothered to text, let alone call, her. On top of this, you have deliberately started to ignore her attempts to contact you. Caller ID has never been so useful and a breakup has never been more imminent.
Number 9
There’s no talk of the future
One of the most natural and exciting parts of being involved with someone is planning the future together. You’re perfectly content to plan for the holidays, dream about where you want to make your home, and ponder possible names for your kids because it gives you a feeling of safety. These thoughts of the future perpetuate the sentiment that the two of you will always be a loving couple that grows old together.

Raise any of these subjects now, and all you receive is a noncommittal nod or grunt; neither of you are willing to talk about where you want to spend your vacation in the summer or which concerts you want to attend.
Number 8
Lack of effort
Remember how, when you first got together, neither of you could come up with plans quick enough on what to do together. Long walks, picnics on the beach, spontaneous romantic getaways, and so on, were all romantic options for you and your new lover. Now you can’t even be bothered to arrange a date to keep the passion alive. In fact, you’re happiest when you’re listlessly sitting at home watching TV or a DVD -- anything to avoid talking to each other.
Number 7
Fighting dirty
The two of you used to have silly little fights that were only slightly more mature than a school-yard spat. Now you’re engaged in full-on war games in which anything goes. You know what her weak spots are -- her weight, her body image and her mother -- and you use them just to rile her up. You’re not alone, as the rules of engagement clearly state that she can do exactly the same thing back -- she laughs at your sexual prowess and tells her girlfriends how small your dipstick is.
Number 6
Fighting quickly
You used to see her little jibes as humorous and you were able to laugh them off. Now, the slightest word from her gaping hole that you find irritating leads you to throw down the gauntlet and pick a fight without a second’s notice. If this is the case, it suggests a deep-seated resentment for your partner, and is a sign that things could get real ugly if you don’t leave now and break up.
Number 5
Fighting publicly
Fighting with your partner is bad enough, but entering a screaming match in public is a definite sign that you’re in a relationship that’s out of control. If you don’t even care who hears or sees the problems that you have, it’s a sure sign that you’ve lost all respect for your partner. Short of stepping onto a soapbox on the street corner, tell her that you’re breaking up with her.
Number 4
Yearning for independence
It used to be that you wanted to spend every single waking minute with your girl; you’d share the shower first thing in the morning, you’d meet for lunch and you’d pick her up after work (even though it was out of your way) just to have more time together. Now all you want to do is go out with your buddies or even work double overtime just so you don’t have to spend any more time together than is absolutely necessary. Dreaming about your bachelorhood, romanticizing past relationships or fantasizing about becoming a player are all signs that your current relationship is doomed.
Number 3
Keeping secrets
The basis of any successful relationship is trust. This means sharing every intimate detail with no lies, no secrets, and no unexpected skeletons. If that suddenly disappears, what’s the point in continuing? If you can’t trust your partner with something your friend told you, or with something that might affect their own situation (either with a friend, family or work) it’s clear you no longer feel you can confide in them and it’s time to pack up and go.
Number 2
Change in perception
Remember how you used to think her little button nose was cute? Or how her strange little laugh was funny and endearing? Now that same button nose makes her look like a pig, and that laugh is less bearable than Fran Drescher’s. When you look at your love bug all you see are her ugly qualities -- physical or otherwise. You look at her now and see cellulite that causes dry heaves and those freckles on her chest make you think of leprosy. If you can’t see past her normal faults, it’s another sign that your relationship has had its day.
Number 1
No more sex
We all know how animalistic our sexuality becomes when we enter a new relationship. Heck, rabbits look like monks compared to how active we are. Then, like an overdosed rock star, your sexuality fizzles and you’re only getting your noodle wet a few times a month. When your action comes from the sex and advice column in your local newspaper, and there’s no sign of improvement, it’s usually an indication that the spark has gone and it’s time to move on to sexier pastures.
in and out of love
Whether or not you have experienced -- or are experiencing -- any of these signs, you’ll know when it’s time to break up with her. It may be obvious, but just having a gut feeling and sensing something is wrong is a key factor in knowing that your relationship is a bust. You know each other well, or at least you used to, and you know when something is wrong -- it’s this same something that tells you the whole thing has run its course. If that’s the case, get on with the show and get out before you lose your sanity.

Conversation Tips - Dating Tips and Dating Advices

Women want sex just as much as men, but most men have no clue when it comes to getting the whole process started -- namely, how to handle the very first conversation. If you don’t have a game plan, it’s easy to let one opportunity after another pass you by. Here are 10 tips to help you start conversations with attractive women EVERYWHERE.
Number 10
Start chatting up EVERYONE
Part of the very CORE of successfully starting conversations with women is BASIC social skills. It’s important to practice starting conversations with as many people as possible, then use those skills with women you’re attracted to. Take advantage of every situation you can to start conversations and connect with people -- don’t be picky. If you can talk about irony, make sarcastic jokes that are funny, or make the other person laugh, ALL THE BETTER. If you start five conversations a day for the next 90 days, you’ll have started 450 new conversations with strangers. This ALONE will go a long way to reprogram your instinctive “fear approach response.”
Number 9
Incorporate different places into your weekly routine
Most guys have schedules that don’t put them into close proximity with a ton of women -- and then they complain that it’s so hard to meet them. Alter your lifestyle just a tad to include locations and situations that make it easy to meet women. As part of the natural flow of your life, include a coffee shop near a busy shopping or business district, a restaurant that hires a lot of attractive women and has a lot of turnover, and a trendy shopping mall. When you do, you won’t believe how many opportunities you’ll have to hone your skills for approaching women.
Number 8
Stop worrying about going out alone
Most men feel like fools if they go out to meet women alone. They don’t like going to bars or clubs without a buddy or two because they have the irrational thought that women will think they’re losers because they’re not there with someone and they feel like everyone is watching them and judging them for being alone. But most of the guys I know who are the MOST successful with women actually PREFER to go out alone. Try this: Go out alone one night this weekend -- not to meet women, but simply to watch and notice that no one cares about you at ALL. It’ll be a liberating experience for you… trust me.
Number 7
Get a handle on fear
The fear of approaching a woman; the fear of rejection; the fear attractive women won’t like you; the fear of making a physical advance: These things are all UNIVERSAL -- almost all men experience them in one way or another. You need to realize that this stuff is natural and you CAN overcome it if you want. The first step is to stop putting too much importance on any one situation and start thinking long-term and of the big picture. Focus on learning the SKILL. Girls will come and go, but when you develop the skill of getting ANY girl, it will last a lifetime.

Number 6
Stay out of the “loop”
What do guys do when they see a woman they’d like to approach? They get stuck in “inaction loops.” In other words, they FREEZE. Why? Because they try to come up with something “original and charming” to say; they try to think of the perfect compliment; they imagine she’s not single and that she’ll react negatively; or they start thinking there’s no way in hell she’d be interested in a guy like them. Do whatever it takes to stay OUT of these deadly loops. A simple solution is to just walk over and use a standard conversation opener. Keep it simple -- don’t over-think yourself right out of the game.
Number 5
Remember keys to starting conversations with women
When you see a cute girl, it’s important to remind yourself of some simple rules about approaching: Always approach a girl within three seconds -- don’t procrastinate. Saying anything is better than saying nothing at all. You can only learn at worst, and lessons are priceless. If this one doesn’t work, there will be 100 more in the future. It’s all upside, and no downside. Remember these key points for approaching women and it’ll make chatting up hotties a walk in the park.
Number 4
Get through the first few minutes
Most men don't realize this, but 99% of the first few minutes of your conversation with any woman aren’t about HER, they are about her PERSONA. A woman will play all sorts of games to block your progress so she can slow things down and maintain control. The last thing she wants to happen is for things to get hot and heavy too quickly, which may cause you to lose respect for her -- at least, this is what she believes. Even if a woman really likes you, she’ll probably be resistant at first, play hard to get, and even act uninterested. Some women get nervous around men, especially when they’re attracted to him. Don’t take any of this stuff personally, just be patient and persist.
Number 3
Appeal to her “weird” side
Every woman has a weird, dorky, off-beat side, but most men don’t get to see or interact with this side for very long. The key is for you to know that this side of her is in there, and then to talk to it and draw it out by teasing, latching on when you see it, etc. This is part of the key to giving her the experience of “I feel so comfortable with you,” and giving her the feeling that she’s known you for a long time. One way to do this is to call her a dork or a spaz or even a brat until you feel her shift. When she suddenly realizes you’re talking to that dorky side of her that few other men can bring out of her she'll begin to feel much more at ease with you. When you reach that point and get past a woman’s persona, that’s when MAGIC happens.
Number 2
Get success minded
We humans often learn TOO quickly. If we have just one unsuccessful experience, we “learn” that what we did doesn’t work. If we have several of these negative experiences, we become CONVINCED whatever it is we've been doing doesn’t work. This type of reasoning can spill over into our self-images and we begin to think, “It must be ME that’s the problem… something is wrong with ME.” Many men try to start a conversation or two with women, but when things don’t go as planned they decide something is wrong with them and that they have “failed.” But the way to turn any failure into a success is to LEARN from it. Success-minded individuals don’t see failure when they don’t have success right away -- instead, they think, “This is the time when success is right around the corner.” Try this mentality on for yourself -- you’ll be blown away by the results.
Number 1
Rehearse your approach
It’s important to mentally rehearse first conversations with women -- especially when you’re first starting out. Plan what you’re going to say, how she’s likely to respond and what you’re going to do in each possible situation. Take the time to mentally rehearse all of the steps of the approach in detail; the words you’ll use and the voice tone and body language, too. Also plan for how you’re going to physically and emotionally respond to a woman who isn’t interested in talking to you, and practice how you’ll handle the worst possible situation that may come up. When you do, you’ll realize there’s nothing more for you to fear. So get out there and put your plan into action.

Things To Never Ask Your Girlfriend - dating advices and dating tips

In school, we were taught that there is no such thing as a stupid question. That might hold true

when figuring out the intricacies of algebra or history, but in a relationship, there are many, many stupid questions that can make your life miserable if asked. They may seem like innocuous, innocent queries to you, but in the complex mind of a female, these questions get twisted and analyzed until they are interpreted as mean-spirited missives slathered in deeper meaning and innuendo.

You could fill your relationship with awkward silence and avoid asking any questions at all, but this invites a whole slew of other problems. Instead, we’ve assembled a list of the 10 most notoriously unacceptable questions to ask your significant other. Consider it a guide through a potentially deadly minefield, where the peril isn’t to life or limb, but to your happiness and sex life. Tread lightly.
Number 10
What's for dinner?
This question was acceptable at one point in time -- a time when it was also “acceptable” to grab your secretary’s tush and call her “toots.” These days, it’s become a presumptuous, politically incorrect query that paints you as a backward, misogynistic jerk.

Of course, you’re going to have to ask this question from time to time. But throwing on an apron and having dinner waiting for her when she gets home from work once in a while gives you the political capital to ask without fear of reprisal.
Number 9
Can I borrow some money?
The very foundation of every male/female relationship is based on the man providing for the woman and making her feel secure. It once consisted of us bringing mammoth steaks back to the cave, but now it means providing a measure of financial security.

Asking her to lend you money completely shatters her faith in you to provide this basic function. She will question your money sense, your fiscal responsibility, heck, even your manhood. Ask a buddy, take out a loan, get another job -- do anything but hit your girl up for cash.
Number 8
How many guys have you slept with?
We all fantasize that our girls are pristine virgins untouched by other slimy male dogs. But we also know this probably isn’t the case. It’s natural to wonder just how many guys have had the pleasure of defiling your beautiful delicate flower, but unless you want to open a Costco-sized can of worms, you are going to have to just keep wondering.

What's wrong with asking this question? First of all, it is none of your business; and secondly, you might not be happy with what you hear. Her answer could have far-reaching implications, tainting her in your eyes and really throwing a wrench into your future. As they say, curiosity killed the libido.
Number 7
Are you wearing that?
Girls agonize over their outfits, taking great care in choosing every layer and accessory. So if she comes out of the bedroom for a night out and you pop off with this gem of a question, you are just inviting the mother of all battles.

Odds are that she would probably love to just throw on a pair of jeans and her least wrinkled shirt, but females are held to a higher fashion standard than we are. On top of that, most guys are certainly not in a position to give fashion advice to anyone. If her clothes are really heinous, you can suggest switching plans to stay home for a quiet night in. Otherwise, bite your tongue, tell her she looks beautiful and plan secretly to ruin the offending outfit the next time you do laundry.
Number 6
Don't you ever just want to start over somewhere new?
Occasionally, everyone gets caught in a Groundhog Day-esque rut and fantasizes about pulling up their roots and leaving it all behind. But vocalizing these dreams can leave her feeling hurt and very replaceable. It’s a perfectly understandable reaction to the question; she probably feels quite happy where she is and wouldn’t dream of leaving you.

You are best to keep these escapist fantasies to yourself and focus on making your reality more tolerable. Take up a new hobby or book a vacation with your little honey bunny -- do whatever it takes. Because bringing up this taboo subject is going to do nothing to make your situation better. In fact, it will likely make it a whole lot worse.

Number 5
Do you want to have a threesome?
Unless your girlfriend is a nymphomaniac or porn star (and few guys are that lucky), directly asking her to partake in this long-standing male fantasy is very, very dangerous. Her immediate reaction is most probably going to be negative, with the sting of jealousy bringing out a defensive and emotional response. She’ll self-consciously wonder why she alone isn’t enough to satisfy you, and her tolerance to your innocently wandering eye will all but disappear.

We’ve already looked at ways to approach this risky but potentially very rewarding scenario, but, suffice it to say, straight out asking her for a threesome isn’t your best course of action.
Number 4
Why don't you join the gym?
Whether they are size-zero waifs or triple-chinned monsters, all girls complain about their bodies. Popular culture and the fashion industry have brainwashed them to believe that they are too fat and riddled with cellulite. But when your girl is complaining about how out of shape she is or how her clothes don’t fit, tell her how wrong she is and offer only words of encouragement. Anything outside of this is a prospective time bomb waiting to explode, especially this seemingly practical suggestion. Remember, though: Practicality has very little providence when it comes to matters like this.
Number 3
Did you c*m?
It’s pretty obvious when guys “finish up” during sex. Not so for most females. And with the popular consensus suggesting most girls end up faking their orgasms, there is a lot of uncertainty surrounding the feminine climax.

This does not give you permission to ask her if she had one after you are finished. It puts her on the spot and brings into question her sincerity. It also puts a lot of pressure on her and can make what is supposed to be the most relaxed, enjoyable thing you do together an unpleasant event dependent wholly on her ability to climax, or your ability to make her do it.

This is an important part of your relationship, so keep your lines of communication open. But be tactful and don’t come right out and ask.
Number 2
Are you PMS-ing?
It’s natural to try to rationalize your gal’s irrational behavior. But asking if this mythical monthly syndrome is causing it will succeed only in making her mood exponentially worse (even if it’s true).

If you’re right, she is at the mercy of her hormones and can’t be held responsible for her reaction to your question (which will invariably be bad). If something else is to blame, discrediting whatever it is that is making her upset by lumping it under PMS will only prove two things: You know your acronyms, and you‘re a heartless bastard. Look for the real reason for her mood, and if you fail to find it, just keep your mouth shut and weather the storm.
Number 1
Why do you have to be such a bitch?
It is amazing what can come out of your mouth in the heat of a fight. There are only a few things you can say to get you in real trouble, and asking her this rather pointed question is one of them. The answer you are expecting (that it is hardwired into her gender’s biology) isn’t coming. What will come instead is an all-new level of anger from your girl and an indeterminate extension of your fight.

When you are fighting, keep a level head and watch what you say. Emotions can run high, but you still must be responsible for your actions. Choose your words wisely and defuse the situation.
bite your tongue
There is something to be said for the strong, silent type. Some think his brooding demeanor makes him mysterious and sensual, but in reality, he is just keeping his mouth shut to avoid some of the potholes we’ve covered here. Avoiding a lot of these queries is really just an exercise in common sense, but that isn’t the strongest quality in a lot of us. Use your judgment, keep your wits about you and watch out for these questions.

Dating advice and dating tips Ways To Approach A Babe

We’ve all seen her -- that one woman who is just SO hot that every guy is too intimidated to approach her. But what if some one was willing to do it, and what if that someone was you? The simple truth is that the more attractive a woman is the more likely it is that every other guy is too scared to talk to her. So, here are 10 tips to put yourself ahead of the “pack” by learning how to talk to super-attractive women.
Number 10
Recognize when she’s receptive and when she’s NOT
It’s important that you cultivate the ability to recognize when a woman is “open and receptive” to you, and when she’s not. When she looks at you, does she look away? Does she look down or to the SIDE when she looks away? As you become better and better at seeing receptive “states” in women, you’ll find that your success will improve SUBSTANTIALLY.
Number 9
Know how she’ll react ahead of time
One of the reasons we don’t start conversations with hot women -- in fact, why we don’t even TRY to -- is because we don’t have any idea what to expect. Most of us have never done it, and rarely have we even seen OTHER GUYS do it. So what happens, on average, with a guy who has learned to start conversations with hot women without being overly nervous and who has learned to project a calm, confident, open personality? In most situations, a guy like this will get at least an OPENING… it’s RARE that a woman will treat him “rudely.” And if, occasionally, a woman DOES respond rudely, you know it has more to with HER than it does with YOU.
Number 8
“Reprogram” your fear response
Most guys have a knee-jerk “fear response” when it comes to approaching a particularly attractive woman. If you want to “reprogram” this response fast, then go big and put yourself in a situation where you approach many women in rapid succession. If you approach 10, 20 or even 50 women in a single day, you’ll make TREMENDOUS progress toward rewiring your instinctive fear reaction. Grab a buddy and commit to one another that you’re both going to approach a certain number of women on a particular night. Give each other a mental high five for each approach, and before you know it, you’ll have reached your goal for the evening… And approaching attractive women won’t be NEARLY as big of a deal as it may have been for you in the past.
Number 7
Avoid “negative feedback loops”
What do guys do when they see a woman they’d like to talk to? They get stuck in what I call “inaction loops.” They try to come up with something original and charming to say. Or they try to think of the perfect compliment. Or they starting imagining that she’s not single, that she’s too busy to talk or -- worst of all -- that she wouldn’t be interested in someone like you. All of these thoughts lead to a powerful emotional and physical FEAR response that’s real -- you can feel it in your body. Stay out of this loop by NOT HESITATING when you see a woman you want to approach, and have some sort of opener ready to go. This will get you talking quickly… Instead of going inside your head and letting your imagination work against you.

Number 6
Keep your cool
There are “trip wires” or triggers that can instantly put you in a BAD place with an attractive woman. Most of these big mistakes revolve around giving her your power, acting uncomfortably or unnaturally or letting the situation unnerve you and losing your composure. Avoid behaviors like trying to impress her, giving her more than one compliment, looking for her approval, doing things for her, kissing up to her, etc. At first, you’ll need to consciously avoid these pitfalls. With practice, you’ll get to the point where you NATURALLY avoid them.
Number 5
Never seek her approval
Seeking a woman’s approval is the most common and most deadly mistake men make when talking to women. Think of it as a continuum from bad to good: You need her approval, you want her approval, you’d like her approval, but you’re OK without it. Or, you only care a little bit about what she thinks of you and you could give a rat’s ass if she approves of you or not. Figure out where you’re at this continuum right now, and make it a point to progress with every interaction until you reach the point in which you no longer seek any woman’s approval. Every bit of growth you make in this area has a POWERFUL effect on your ability to chat up and attract those super-babes you’re after…
Number 4
Try different attitudes for your approaches
I’ve seen many different attitudes and roles work well for approaching women: enthusiastic, serious, casual, interested, etc. Develop an approach that fits your personality, but also be willing to try out some styles. It’s perfectly OK to test things out, experiment, and find what works to get the results you want. Think of three different attitudes you could try right now and make it a point to use each of them with at least three different women as soon as possible. This simple exercise can work miracles and put you in touch with a style of game that works for you personally.
Number 3
Ask her opinion
About four or five years ago, I was out at a club and I stumbled upon an interesting way to start conversations with women. I decided it was time to start treating these women as if they were just people who happened to be where I was, and I wanted to chat with them. So I started approaching women and starting conversations with them by asking their opinions on things (especially on topics women find interesting, like the latest celebrity gossip, etc.). I left that night with five phone numbers from some of the hottest women I’d ever met. Asking a woman’s opinion offers the lowest risk, and is one of the simplest ways to start a conversation.
Number 2
Remember that approaching gives YOU a critical advantage
The good news is that it IS possible to rewire yourself and learn how to approach incredibly attractive women, and enjoy both incredible success and advantages as a result. Remember: Most men will NEVER seek this path of overcoming the fear of approaching gorgeous women, so when YOU do, you give yourself an almost unfair advantage over most of the men who are now living or for that matter, who have EVER lived. Pretty deep, huh? When you need a little motivation to nudge you to start talking to a woman, remember the incredible advantage approaching her will give you -- then let it happen.
Number 1
Commit yourself to mastery
Approaching attractive women is one of the “core” skills in your arsenal to improve your success with women. It’ll open all sorts of doors for you and give you ample opportunities to practice your game, not to mention lead to a lot of “fun” with different women. But it’s not something that’ll change overnight. If you really want to get this part of your life handled, make a commitment to become a MASTER at approaching women. Get all the best ideas and techniques you can, practice them out in the field, and never stop learning. That’s the path to true mastery.

Flirting with a Woman - dating advices and dating tips for men

Men will always view the woman as a mystery; a code that needs to be cracked. That is why flirting with a woman can be a little tricky, as they tend to have moods that we may never understand.

The art of flirting and seduction, as with any other skill, does not always come naturally and can be developed. With some effort, in time you would become a magnet for other people.

Smile – This is probably the easiest form of flirting. It brings out your positivity and you are indicating that you are interested to the person you are talking with. But unlike a “regular” smile, a “flirty” smile should be wider than you are used to. Smile often, such as when shaking her hand, introducing yourself, complementing her, among other things. Remember that a smile breaks the ice, and can lead to a conversation. Practice your smile in the mirror and check how to smile without looking too scary.

Get caught looking at her – It may seem to be something shy guys tend to do, but looking away can be flirty. If you want to know to let her know you are interested, just look at her face. When she catches you looking, smile, hold eye contact for a moment, then look away.

Wave a little – Another way of flirting if you get caught looking at a hot girl is to give a little wave. Move your hand a little and smile. It's saying “hello” in a non-intrusive yet very flirty manner.

Wink – Giving a quick and sweet wink can be done with someone from across the room, or at someone during a conversation. However, it is best not to wink excessively. If she says or does something she might view as embarrassing, you can give out a wink as a way of sharing a little moment for just the two of you.

Be creative in introducing yourself – It is important to seduce her mind first. Using the right words would get in her head and have her thinking about you. Also, make her feel comfortable as you talk to her. Women like to talk so establishing a rapport with her is not as hard as it might seem. Just remember to think of the right words before saying it and be sincere in your conversations.

Eye contact – Looking (not staring) at her longer than normal would provide the right message that you are interested to her. Remember to keep your look on her face, glancing on other body parts for a few minutes every once in a while.

Complement her – Open conversations with her by complementing. However, be careful on what you're complementing. On your first meeting, it is best to focus your praises on her face and not on her body (even if she looks hot).

Check her body language – Most men fail to realize the importance of body language. Women tend to make certain body movements—and they are usually unaware of this—indicating whether or not they like the man whom they are talking to. For instance, combing her hair around the ear using her fingertips is a good sign that she likes you. Other notable movements include eye contact, trying to heighten or lower her voice just to match yours, and if she is leaning closer. However, do not consider one movement as the overall impression. If she crosses her arms, it could either mean she is being defensive at meeting new people or being uncomfortable towards you.

Humor her – Having a good laugh provides a healthy conversation between you and her. She creates a positive impression of you, which is vital if you want to establish a relationship with her. However, remember that sense of humor can be relative. What can be funny to you can be horrible for her. Try to tell her a joke that got you laughing and see if she reacts positively.

Keep the positive – Maintain the positive topics that you use in the conversation. Remember that talking to her should be fun and leave the intelligent exchange to the philosophers. Avoid topics that usually lead to dispute such as religion, politics, past relationships, rants, and other negative discussions.

Talk a little more, but not about yourself – One objective to flirting a woman is to know more about her. However, keep yourself a mystery as much as possible. Not talking too much about yourself would make women longing to know about you more.

Touch lightly – You can touch your prospect without harassing the girl. This can be as simple as placing your hand lightly on her hand for a moment, or touching her back for a moment as you walk to a table to sit down. Touching is actually a good indicator to know if the girl is interested to you: if she pulls away, then she could either be not interested or just not wanting to go on a deeper level yet.

Make decisions quickly – Taking your time choosing the perfect coffee blend or looking at the restaurant menu does not give a good signal to the woman. By making decisions quickly and firmly, you are proving to her that you know what you want.

Be patient – Take things slowly. If she doesn't want to be touched on your first date, then don't force it. If she is the aggressive type, try resisting her. Either way, she would be intrigued more about you.

Do the “goodbye compliment” – If you are really shy to approach a girl, you could simply go near her before you leave and say something like, “Hi, I have to go now, but before I did, I really wanted to let you know that you have a really great smile, and I noticed that. I wish I had more time to spend with you, but I have to go.” After doing your “goodbye compliment,” leave as soon as possible even if the girl wants you to stay some more. This allows you to build your confidence in approaching women without having to take the risk of rejection. If the girl seems interested to you, ask for her phone number.

Know when to stop – Remember to stop flirting while it is still fun. Flirting too often during a conversation may make you appear as cheesy. If you stop flirting on a high point, your new friend may feel good when thinking of you, and want to see you again.

Dating tips and dating advices for men - Avoiding Rejection When “Getting Physical”

Most men don’t know the first thing about how to take things to a “physical” level with a woman. Here’s why:

Let’s say you’ve been out on a date with a woman, and you’re now back at your place, having an enjoyable conversation. You look over at her. She looks back at you. You want to kiss her. She knows that you want to kiss her. You know that she is the one with all the power. If you try to kiss her, and she pulls away, she might reject you forever. If you don’t try to kiss her, maybe it will happen later, or maybe she’ll even kiss you…

The risk of being rejected forever is so powerful and creates such fear that you decide to just “walk away” from the situation and hope something happens later.

Or, let’s say that you’ve been out with a woman a few times, and you have just kissed her for the first time. You know that she’s enjoying it. She knows that you want her. You’d really like to do more, but you’re afraid that if you try, you’ll be seen as “moving too fast”, or even worse… a “pushy pervert”.

You hate the idea of being rejected after you’ve invested all that time and come so far… So you decide to stop and hope that maybe things will “heat back up” later.
We’ve All Been There

If you really stop and think about it, the reason why you run into problems in situations like these is that:

1. You don’t understand exactly what turns women on.
2. You are afraid of rejection.
3. You don’t know what SHE’S thinking, so you hesitate.

I honestly believe that most men cause their own problems and resistance when it comes to “getting physical” with a woman. Yes, you read that right… Men are the ones who cause the problems.

It’s not the woman!

It’s the fact that you don’t understand the situation, what’s really going on, and how to proceed.
What Women Want… But Will Never Tell You

Here’s a little secret that most women will never share with you… She knows what’s on your mind. Women can tell what you’re thinking! If you want to kiss her, but you’re nervous about it, she knows. If you’re kissing her and want to do more… she knows. And here’s the kicker: If you’re afraid of her rejecting you, she knows. Really.

Women are approximately ten times as good at men when it comes to reading and interpreting subtle body language, and they know what we’re thinking. Let me correct myself… slightly. They know what most men are thinking.

Now, let’s talk a little bit about the topics of resistance and rejection.

Here’s an interesting thought:

In their book “Sexual Interactions: Basic Understandings“, Albert and Elizabeth Allgeier mention that in one study almost 40% of women reported refusing sexual intercourse when they actually wanted it. They call this “The token no”.

So, what’s going on here?

Hold on… one more thing before I discuss this, I want to point out that this doesn’t mean that a woman wants a man to force himself on her. Never force a woman to do anything!

Here’s what’s going on… Women enjoy anticipation. Anticipation leads to sexual arousal. Write that down… on your forehead. You need to remember that women like the idea of wanting and expecting what’s going to happen.

The reason why a lot of women say that they don’t want to sleep with men even when they do is because the man doesn’t get it. Men act like they would enjoy it if a woman just took off her clothes and said, “Let’s do it.”

Women act like they want a man to chase them around all night… and then maybe do it. Maybe. So if you want her to feel more turned on, and to get less “resistance”, then use anticipation.

I have a technique that I teach that’s called “Two steps forward, one step back”. This is a way to increase a woman’s sexual arousal and amplify the attraction that’s already present in the situation.

Here’s how it works:

Let’s say that you’re talking to a woman at your place, and you start holding her hand. After a few minutes, take your hand back and stop. Lean back. Keep talking.

A few minutes later, reach over and take her hand again… and keep talking. Then, lean over and kiss her (use “The Kiss Test” as described at my website and in my “Double Your Dating” ebook). After you’ve kissed her, stop. Lean back again. Keep talking.

A few minutes later, reach over and kiss her again. This time, kiss her for a little longer. Kiss her a little deeper. Then stop. Lean back. Smile.

When you use this technique, you will be absolutely stunned at the results.

First of all, it completely changes the situation. Instead of a woman resisting you, she’ll be much more likely to try to get you to do more. She’ll very likely be confused. She’ll be thinking to herself, “What’s going on here? Most guys try to push themselves on me, or they don’t do anything at all. This guy seems like he’s so in control of himself. And I keep getting more turned on. Maybe I should tell him that we’re not going to sleep together tonight. But this is so great…”

And the best part of this technique is that it’s what women want you to do!

Of course, they’d never tell you this. And even if a woman could explain it, she wouldn’t want to tell you. Women want men who already get it.

I want to mention a couple of more important things.

First, if you want to even get to the point where it’s time to hold a woman’s hand, kiss her, and get even more physical, then you must understand how attraction works, and how to make women feel that powerful emotion.

If you don’t, then knowing all the fancy techniques in the world won’t help you. It’s also very useful to understand what to do after you’ve kissed a woman… the details of how to do other, more intimate things.

Dating tips and dating advices - Seductive Pheromones

Pheromones have been around since the beginning of time. However, it is only recently that the pheromon and it’s benefits have truly come to shine. Men and women have been searching for ways to attract each other for years. Wearing revealing clothing, buying fancy cars and spending hours working on personal appearance might in fact prove futile with the innovation of the pheromone cologne.

Let’s face it, everyone wants the edge in the mating game, right? Being smarter than your opposition for your chosen mate is all part of evolution in action. And nothing is more natural than the mating game. But how can you get the winning edge over others who want the same mate you do?

Words can be awkward. You just can’t walk up to someone and say, “Let’s go to bed!” But you can communicate this message in a more subtle, natural way with the help of a pheromone. Smelling nice always helps. But smelling nice and getting laid like a Rock Star is a totally different ball game!

Natural pheromone is found in perspiration. We all know that perspiration is an unpleasant smell, but scientists have been able to take the pheromone and segregate them from the other particles. The end result is a liquid that is unscented and invisible.

Many people think that human pheromones are only used by men to attract women. In fact, that could not be further from the truth. Although men seem to use this sex pheromone more than women, there are many women worldwide who are benefiting from this powerful natural agent and are seeing in some cases better results.

Although it is used by all different kinds of people, it is especially popular among those who are socially awkward. In the dating scene, making the first move is usually the most intimidating part. With pheromone perfume, you will never have to make the first move again. No matter where you are, you will have people approaching you and starting up conversations. If you are concerned about your physical appearance, then a pheromone spray could be the perfect option.

The benefits of using pheromones don’t stop once you have the date of your dreams. Pheromone products are also quite helpful in the bedroom as well. Scientific tests have proven that women will have more frequent and powerful orgasms when sex pheromones are used. So not only will pheromone products make you more appealing to the opposite sex, they will also spark a new flame between the sheets.

There are a variety of ways that you can go about acquiring pheromone concentrate. Many stores that offer cologne and perfume will also offer pheromones. However, the best place to buy pheromones is the Internet.

There are many pioneers that have found the benefits of pheromones themselves and have since created online businesses. By simply taking a few minutes to browse around our pheromone reviews, you will get all of the answers to any possible androstenone pheromone questions you may have. On top of that, you can order pheromone products here by a simple click of the mouse. There are many companies that say that they have experience marketing the best pheromone but our company has one of the most reputable histories.

Although it may seem to be too good to be true, you will learn the benefits of pure pheromones after using them only once. Heads will turn, your little black book or your mobile (if you have finally stepped into the 21st century!) will fill up and your life will instantly become more exciting. You have the chance to change your entire life and develop a whole new personality, so take that chance today with some of the best pheromone products.

Dating Advice and dating tips - Signs She’s Going To Dump You

Women in relationships aren't often recognized for their outstanding poker faces, especially when things aren't going well. The good news for you is that by just paying a bit of attention, it usually isn't hard to get a handle on what is going on inside her head as it concerns the state of your relationship or its future.

If she's thinking that the end is near for the two of you, her actions will no doubt be affected. Remember: She isn't sending out these signals purposely, so the odds are good that she'll reveal her true feelings before she is able to say anything out loud. You might be able to spot the signs that the end is near and avoid having to sit down and have a heart-to-heart conversation or an awkward breakup.

Here are signs she might be sending that should have your breakup alarm going off. If you start seeing these tip-offs, you'd better decide if you want to jump ship before you get thrown overboard or if you want to try to make it work.
She doesn't make future plans
Planning ahead is the hallmark of what makes a relationship serious rather than casual. Women in love are usually eager to secure your time well in advance of important events to make sure you'll be able to make it, so that she won't miss out on the opportunity to show you off. If you find that your lady isn't dropping hints about events or plans more than a month or two away, there's a good chance she isn't sure you'll be around. For this reason, she's reluctant to secure future complications (such as tickets to events, travel arrangements, or RSVP situations).
She avoids your family & friends
A girlfriend looking to secure a place in your life will have to make nice with both your family and your friends, but she wouldn't put in the time if she didn't think there was any future in your relationship. There are two reasons why she might not want to spend the quality time: Either she doesn't like them or she doesn't want to become too ingrained in your social circle, which would make it harder for her to walk away. And if she genuinely dislikes them, a relationship-minded girlfriend is likely to throw you a bone every once in a while if she knows she’s going to be a part of your life.


She never leaves anything at your place
There's a pretty common joke about women “accidentally on purpose” leaving things at a man's house to ensure or indicate a repeat visit -- and there's a reason why the story is so believable. Women in strong relationships are apt to make themselves comfortable in their boyfriend's place and leave a few things laying around. It can be practical items like a brush and a pair of pyjamas or something personal like a book; in either case they signal her intent to visit again. If your girlfriend always packs a complete overnight bag and is reluctant to leave anything behind, it might signal that she isn't sure that you are going to remain on her to-do list and she is wary of losing those items for good.
She doesn't confide in you
When something bad happens at work or she has a fight with a friend, women have different people they go to with the ins and outs of the events and her feelings about them. Some have a go-to girlfriend, others a family member, but eventually a boyfriend is going to be exposed to whatever the most recent crisis was. How she involves you will speak volumes: If you find yourself getting the short story devoid of her emotional reactions, she might be figuring that it isn't worth explaining to you. If she divulges the back story, describes everyone involved and solicits your opinion, you've got a woman on your hands who is trying to invite you into her personal world. This signals your importance to her and her openness to sharing herself with you -- both of which indicate that she's in it for the long haul.
She doesn't argue with you
It's rare to find yourself in a perfect relationship with absolutely no conflict -- there are always going to be issues that need to be resolved, apologies that have to be made, and arguments that need to be had. A woman with no emotional investment in you and your relationship won't bother; few people will argue if they have no desire for resolution. That's what makes make-up sex so damn good -- arguments and disagreements are almost always emotionally charged and are a great indicator of passion in a relationship. If your woman calls you on your mistakes and defends herself vigorously, she probably cares enough to sort things out with you before they become relationship deal-breakers.
sensing the end
Not everyone can mind-read in relationships, but just about anyone can stay tuned to the subconscious actions of romantic partners who are wavering in a relationship. If you stay on your toes you might be able to head off your next breakup with a preemptive strike of your own, or a battle plan to turn things around -- the choice is yours.

Dating advice and dating tips - How To Talk To Any Woman In Any Situation

This week I would like to turn the tables around and try something a little bit different. Something that just might make you take a new perspective and think about things in a way you’ve never thought about before… something that just might stir you up enough to get you to take some action…

First, I’d like you to think about the last time you saw a really attractive woman… you wanted to go over and talk to her, but for whatever reason you just didn’t do it. I’m talking about a really hot woman.

Take your time if you need it. I’m not going anywhere. Good.

Now, let me ask you something:

Did you ever stop a day or two after one of these situations happened to think about where that particular woman might be, and what she might be doing? Did you ever stop to think about what the rest of her day was like after she walked by you? About the ten or twenty other men that saw her that day who didn’t have the nerve to talk to her… and the two or three that did…? About the, most likely, boring job that she went to, the same-old-same-old “Wow, you’re beautiful” lines that she heard from the guys who got up the nerve to talk to her?

Did you ever consider that it might be useful to take a little time out and consider what it might be like to be an attractive woman, walking through life having almost every man you see light up with the “Whoa” look?

Hmmm…

What do you think we might be able to figure out if we just took a few minutes to explore what that attractive woman’s private life is like? Here are a few things that I’ve come up with:

1. Most attractive women are bored out of their minds by most men. One of the reasons for this is that guys have no idea what to do when they run into an attractive woman, so they do the same default thing: dumb look, compliment.
2. As I’ve said before, and I’m sure I’ll say many, many, many times in the future: You can’t bore a woman into feeling attracted to you. If she’s most likely got a boring life like everyone else, and you do something that every one of the other 499 guys she’s going to walk by this month did, then you’re probably not going to attract any special attention.
3. If you just start with the idea of not doing what other guys do you will be waaaaaayyy ahead of the game.

Wow, this is fun, isn’t it? Bet you never thought you’d be thinking like a woman, did ya? So, what are a few things you might do to? Maybe not be like the other 499 boring, predictable, “nice” loser guys she encountered? And maybe be interesting, attractive, attention-getting in a way that makes her feel like you might actually be someone to provide her with a pinch of spice in her life?

I thought you’d never ask…

And, as you may have already predicted, I have a few more ideas of my own (but don’t let that stop you from thinking about this on your own as often as you get a chance).

To start with, you’d probably want to get rid of the “Wow, you’re a beautiful woman, and I’m just an average guy admiring you” vibe. That’s not helping. Next, you could take a moment and think about how a guy that she would feel attracted to might act… then choose that style. My experience is that if you take an attitude of “I guess fate has good taste putting us in the same place, now let’s see if you have a personality to match your looks”, then stir in a generous portion of Cocky & Funny, you’re likely to do well.

Here’s a variation of something I’ve used myself once or twice:

* YOU: “Hey, can I ask you a quick question?” (leaning back and playing it cool, talking cool and slow)
* HER: “Sure”
* (pause.. pause.. pause for suspense)
* YOU: “Are you single?” (stone cold straight face)
* HER: “Well, um…”
* YOU: “I’ll take that as a yes…” (nodding, sly smile)
* HER: (Laughter)
* YOU: “Well, I just happen to know someone that I think might really like you… if you’re more than just a pretty face, that is… He’s funny, has great taste, and I think you’d like him… I’d love to sit down and get your life story, but I’m on my way somewhere… do you have email?” (very cool, calm tone of voice)
* HER: “Yes.”
* YOU: Great… (takes out pen)… write it down for me, and I’ll have, uh (clears throat) HIM send you an email.”
* (Get email and wish the lady a good day.)

Now, let’s talk about what just happened here.

First off, did I give her any compliments? Did I act like the other 499 guys? Did I instantly communicate that “I’m not worthy”? Hell no.

I said, “Hey, can I ask you a quick question?” in a very laid back, almost too relaxed and mysterious tone of voice (your body language is a very important component of this approach…). Anyone will respond to that with a “yes”.

Next, I did something kind of fun: I asked her directly if she was single. LOL… I really love this one. It’s so fun. Most guys will say, “Uh, I’ll bet you have a

boyfriend, huh?” or “So, do you have a man?” or some other lame thing. The question, “Are you single?”, takes women off guard. It’s great. And then being assumptive when she hesitated with an answer… in a cocky & funny way… magic.

Next, I followed up with a cocky, funny, semi-confusing little bit about “knowing someone” that might find her interesting. Now, she might think that it’s really me, but she won’t know for sure until she gets the email. And even then you might play with her a bit… “So, what did you think of my friend? I think he might like you…” etc.

The point is, I can pretty much guarantee you that this particular sequence hasn’t happened to her lately. She’s still trying to overcome her sheer awe
about how many guys in a row can ask “Don’t I know you from somewhere?”. This kind of fun approach will be a welcome breath of fresh air.

Now, I want you to do something. Go back and read it again… very carefully. Imagine it happening exactly like it’s written. Try to imagine it in a few different settings. Work on it until you can clearly see it happening in your mind’s eye. (The reason I can see it clearly is because I’ve done it so many times in real life!)

OK, so now you know how to approach women. Fantastic.

I can remember when I first learned how to start approaching women… I thought that if I could just start conversations easily, the rest of it would be a snap. Well, after meeting a lot of women, but not getting so many dates… and having the few dates I did get not go anywhere… I realized that there was a lot more to it.

Dating Advice and dating tips : An Exercise For Eliminating Fear Of Rejection By The guy/ gal

There’s a lot of talk about “approach anxiety” when is comes to approaching and meeting someone attractive. My personal belief is that we all too often have actually “rejected” ourselves before the potential meeting ever actually happens. This is tragic, because there is a simple yet effective way to make real progress from this kind of self-limitation.

As the title has already telegraphed, what we’re talking about here is training yourself how to see yourself as others see you… and then how to see others as they see themselves.

So what does that mean?

You as a human being are in a remarkable position. Have you ever considered how wild it truly is that out of six billion plus human beings just like you on this planet, you will only ever see light through the eyes of one of them? You are confined to your own physical being, at least as far as the laws of physics apply in this life. The metaphysics of all this are, of course, a subject better suited to some other article that is not about dating and relationships. Fair enough.

But since we are focused like a laser on your total, utter and massive success in the dating world-up to and including complete control over your dating life - you’d best believe that there is tremendous value in exploring this concept more deeply from a certain perspective.

So many of us artificially limit ourselves from believing that we can possibly deserve the kind of partner we want. Going way beyond “approach anxiety“…going way beyond “getting beat by a girl” and indeed way beyond anything you’ve ever heard from me until now, it can be safely assumed that much of the problem is directly attributable to how you see yourself vs. how you see others.

Here’s what I mean.

Since you know every intimate detail of your own thoughts, fears and weaknesses-as well as your strengths, of course-you know all of your own darkest secrets. Every imperfection, every prurient thought, every doubt and indeed-every single blasted thing that would cause you humiliating embarrassment if others knew.

Armed with this knowledge, what do you do? You go out and become completely disarmed by a “beautiful” and apparently “perfect” creature of the opposite gender. In your mind, he or she is flawless.

Then comes the vortex of self-doubt. “Oh man…I could never be in her league. She’s a veritable vision of perfection…and I can’t even get into an elevator without feeling claustrophobic, come from a foreign country, need a haircut, have a big nose, have spring allergies, say stupid things when nervous, chew my toenails in private and once cheated on a math test.”

So once again you talk yourself out of being successful.

Erstwhile, your “vision of perfection” is inside her own state of being thinking, “Girl…get yourself together! Your panty lines are showing, you have stupid looking ears, are habitually late for work, snort when you laugh, have two crooked teeth and wear contact lenses. No wonder you’ve been dateless for a month now!”

Crazy stuff, isn’t it? If only we could see inside each other’s heads. Better yet, if only we could read the thoughts of others regarding us.

Well, you can’t do that, but here are two simple exercises you can do:
Eliminate private knowledge as a “limiting factor” and take notes regarding how others respond to you

First and foremost, realize that your private thoughts are not public. Nobody else can evaluate you by them, so stop using them against yourself. They do not exist in the minds of others because they cannot. Next, consider the comments you receive from people. Where you hear patterns repeated time and again it’s time to believe what you are hearing. If pointing to ways you can better yourself, do so and deserve what you want. If you hear recurring positive comments and/or see recurring positive reactions to your presence and/or interactions, begin to recognize the truly positive manner in which others perceive you. This sounds so simplistic, yet how many of us go home and obsess over self-perceived “negatives” that we are repeatedly told are positives? If you think I must be kidding, actively begin to look for clues in your social life where you have previously been oblivious. Note the patterns that you detect, and trust them.
Pretend you are walking in the shoes of someone you find attractive

Okay, here’s the “power ball”. Ready? My guess is that when you encounter someone who really motors your sexual attraction levels, that person is actually more “perfectly imperfect” than “perfect”. The next time you are practically paralyzed by attraction towards someone, I want you pretend for a moment that you were that person instead of yourself. In your darkest, most self-critical thoughts, what would you be most self-conscious about? Go ahead and in your blind attraction make an effort to approach that concept with sober judgment. You will likely identify an entire litany of faults and potential attitudes that would make him or her very insecure, at least theoretically. Ironically, you may find yourself recognizing traits and/or features that some people may be self-critical about but which are at the same time exactly what is making you so hot for this person. It’s strange for sure. But it is an eye opener.

Dating tips and dating advices - Secrets of Talking With Women

Most of us have endured some silences in our relations with women we wish hadn’t happened. Well, first, you don’t have to be scared of silences, because they can be helpful. And second, there are ways to get a sparkling conversation going from next to ZERO material.
Let’s Take a Moment to Look Left

Brief related tangent time: one question I get asked a lot is “What should I talk about?”. Sure, now you know how you’re supposed to talk, but so many guys get stuck on what to talk about. After all, those dead silences are murder for attraction, right?

First off, not so fast bad-mouthing silence. More on that later. Second, it really doesn’t matter what you talk about, so long as you make it interesting. I’ve said this again and again, but let me stress it now: you can talk about anything and it’ll be ok. You can tell a date her butt looks huge in that dress. Say it right and she won’t walk out or slap you, she’ll laugh. You can wonder aloud whether postal workers get high on stamp glue. You can go on for half an hour about the off-color corner of that rare Elvis stamp you have framed on your wall… well, ok, maybe not that one. If you talk at length about certified punchline hobbies, you might be in trouble. Unless you’re making fun of them, of course.
Can stupid stuff work? You betcha

But seriously, this isn’t rocket science. This isn’t even high school science, despite how often the word “chemistry” gets bandied about.

When I was still studying these skills, some of my “natural” friends would tell me lines they’d used with great success. I didn’t believe it. The things they related to me sounded so… dumb, I couldn’t fathom an attractive intelligent woman would go for them.

Then I saw these guys in action. Sure, I could hear the stupidity of some of the lines – the corniness, the transparency, the if-this-were-in-a-Bond-movie-I’d-groan-now quality to them. Still, they worked. I had new respect for groaners in Bond movies. The key was all in the nonverbal delivery, as we’ve talked about at length.

Ok, so now that I’ve hopefully reminded you not to worry too much about the actual content, let me add sometimes you don’t need content at all.
The Golden Silence is as good as the Golden Tongue

Strange, eh? I have one friend who isn’t a gabber, who doesn’t like to partake in anything close to small talk. And when he’s out with women, there are numerous silences. And it works. Why? Because he’s comfortable with it.

Listen, reality is all about perception. If you’re scared of awkward silences, they become awkward. If you aren’t, the silences become natural. And that kind of thing stinks of relaxed confidence.

When you’re relaxed and comfortable enough to let a silence come and it doesn’t bug you, it communicates all sorts of positive things. Relaxed Confidence. Real (no games). Uh, we need a new word here, not gravity, but the opposite of frivolity. But while staying playful. We’ll call it gravolity.

To be clear, don’t overdo this. If you never say anything, well, you’re just boring. But don’t be scared of the occasional silence, or letting the lady start a topic and playing with it. (My silent friend does this all the time – and pretty soon, the women are starting all sorts of conversations and he’s viewed as fascinating because they’re talking about things they like to talk about. Who started the conversation never really enters into their head.)

Hey, by the way, did you know that psychological studies say that the person who is least comfortable with silence in a group – and hence breaks it – is almost always the most insecure? Still want to fill every last second of air time?
Silence is nice, but… let’s talk

Still, sometimes you will find yourself in need of something to talk about. And your mind will be blank. You know the time for conversation is here – but you’re clueless how to start it.

Well, this is one of the reasons I recommend avoiding dinners and traditional dates, and prefer shared activities. Especially in fun cool areas. Who needs to worry about conversation when there’s a man on a leash walking in front of you on the sidewalk, or a shop window with a dismembered mannequin head smeared with lipstick wearing a Ronald McDonald wig and a sign saying “Love me?”

If you can’t think of anything to say in stimulating areas, then you’re just not trying. Or you’re freaking – in which case you need to use one of your relaxation triggers to get yourself calm and able to think.

Come on, some of our granddaddies kept their heads with the enemy shooting at them. You can do it with an attractive lady. But you can’t always be in a Greenwich Village knockoff. Sometimes you need to come up with topics all by your lonesome, right? Wrong. See, the definition of conversation is you have to have at least two people. And that dynamic helps a lot.
Having the conversation she wants, every time

Lets borrow a trick from sales, where the seller needs to establish a friendly connection quickly. How do they do it? They listen for key words in statements they hear. And you can do the same. One simple sentence from your favorite lady can lead to a night’s worth of dialogue.

Example:

- “Hi.”
- “No, I’m not. Or were you offering? I barely know you, and already you bring psychotropic drugs into our relationship? Wow, you are one crazy chick.” (She should be laughing, if you delivered it right and she isn’t a nun.)
- “No, I don’t do drugs on a first date!” (key word: take your pick, drugs or date)
- “Oh, but on the second you jump right in? You’ve said two things, and they both relate to illicit substances. Get your mind out of the gutter and learn to enjoy life clean too.” (Then order her a beer).

See what’s going on? Just pick a key word from her conversation, and riff off it. The above doesn’t apply because it’s too early in your duologue, but even within a few minutes of talking to anyone you’ll hear them use keywords that are important to them for whatever reason. Hook onto those and she’ll think you’re the greatest conversationalist ever – because all you talk about is what interests her.

Example:

- “That dog smells like a Thai sewer.” (key word: Thai)
- “And how would you know? When were you in Thailand?”
- “Last month, actually. It’s insane!” (key word: insane)
- “And that’s what attracted you about it? You wanted to find others as crazy as you are?”
- “No! I went to get my scuba diving certification.” (key word(s): scuba diving, and you have a topic for the next 15 minutes that you know she wants to talk about).

“Homework”

Pretty easy, eh? In fact, it’s so easy, I’m going to make your homework nice and simple. Go out and have five conversations where you cue the other person off their keywords. Have five more where you never start a topic, and see how the silence feels, bearing in mind that you are seeking it. Finally, pick five interesting eclectic spots near you, and go for a walk in them. Just comment in your head on what you see.

That’s it. Enjoy your new expression of personal wit and get out there and impress some ladies with it. You’re ready.