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Sunday, July 1, 2007

Top 10 Ways To Get Her To Chase You

Most men naturally assume that it’s the MAN who must pursue the woman. But guys who are naturals at succeeding with women don’t buy into this belief -- and it’s a big part of why they’re always with the most attractive women. What would your life be like if instead of chasing women, women chased you? Here are 10 tips to shift the dynamic in your favor and get women tripping over themselves for a space on your social calendar.
Number 10
Use “reverse rapport”
“Reverse rapport” is when you say and do the opposite of what a guy would do when he’s trying to make a woman like him… but in a sarcastic, overly serious way that assumes the woman already knows, likes and trusts you. The objective here is NOT to try to be sweet and wonderful and nice in order to win her approval. How do you do this? Well, one way is to use a sarcastic comment that’s the OPPOSITE of what a woman wants to hear. Or answer a question a woman asks you with an answer that’s the opposite of what she expects, all in a very sarcastic tone that implies you’re making fun of her. When you do, you’ll create a deep, polarity-charged connection with her that will get her pursuing you in no time flat.
Number 9
Read between the lines
If you’re talking to a woman on the phone and she tells you that she’s seeing someone, understand that she’s saying this more for herself than for you. She probably is casually dating another guy, but she’s feeling attracted to you, so she needs to say this to put on the brakes so she doesn’t feel “promiscuous.” If you find yourself in this situation, tell her something challenging like “Yeah, congratulations… and you know, that’s pretty assumptive thinking that I was trying to pursue you.” She won’t know what to say, and you will have communicated that you’re a confident guy who doesn’t need any woman -- just the kind of guy women LOVE. Don’t be surprised if she calls you back within a week, telling you she wants to get together and that she’s suddenly dumped the guy she was dating (for a chance to get to know you, of course).
Number 8
See beyond getting laid
When I first started learning how to succeed with women and dating, the idea of getting laid was a lot more interesting to me than it is now because I thought that if you could learn how to “get laid” then you’d naturally be able to have any other kind of success you wanted with women. Well, many of the guys I’ve met who are GREAT at “getting laid” don’t have any idea how to find a high-quality woman to have a great relationship with and when they do find one, they have no idea how to keep her around. I think it’s much more interesting and useful to learn how and why women become attracted to men, and why they STAY attracted. This way, you’ll be able to keep that fantastic woman in your life once you find her. There’s nothing wrong with “getting laid,” but it’s only a tiny piece of the puzzle, and it alone won’t lead you to happiness and success in life.
Stop courting, start attracting
There are two basic models for how men approach meeting women: the courtship model, and the attraction model. If you base your approach with women on ATTRACTION, you get a very different response from COURTING them. When you court a woman, her natural response is to run, which makes you want her more and makes her run more. But when you attract a woman, her natural response is to chase YOU. This subtlety makes all the difference in the world.
Number 6
Be the dominant one
Courting is based on what you DO, what you OFFER, and what you GIVE… and is largely based on gifts, dinners, flowers, compliments, etc. Attraction is based on how you communicate, who you are and your masculine identity. Courting takes the “make friends” strategy and supersizes it; it’s about being as nice as possible in order to get her to like you. Attraction isn’t concerned with “liking” because a woman doesn’t need to like you in order to feel attracted to you. Courting is facing the challenge; attraction is BEING the challenge. Courting is about being a follower, submissive and weak; attraction is about being a leader, dominant and strong. Stop courting, start attracting, and you won’t BELIEVE how it can transform your success with women.
Number 5
Show her you get it
Women will act completely different around you and treat you very differently if you’re a guy who “gets it.” The way to show her you’re one of these rare guys is to see when she’s testing you and keep your cool. So if she mentions that other men are interested in her or she says she’s unavailable or she complains about something you do, realize it’s just a test. Then simply say, “Hey, stop that stuff,” and she’ll know what you mean. More importantly, she’ll know she’s dealing with a real man, and she’ll stop at no expense to chase you down.
Number 4
Stay on your own course
Most men orient themselves by following and seeking approval of the woman. She leads, they follow; in fact, she isn’t even leading, but the man tries to convince her to lead with questions and body language that seek approval. This is a horrible mistake, and annoys women to no end. Instead, stay on your course, even when she’s all over the map. Let her reorient her body, behavior, moods, and responses to YOURS. Don’t ever try to get her to lead. Show her you’re the kind of man who loves to be the captain of your own ship, and she’ll feel an undeniable attraction to you.
Number 3
Never backpedal or explain yourself
If you say or do something that seems to upset a woman, don’t try to explain your way out of it or do something to “make her feel better.” Don’t act like you screwed up or show her that you’re nervous just because she’s acting upset. Just move on as if nothing happened. Get right on to the next topic or story. If she stays on it, whines or complains, just say “Get over it, it was a joke, stop being a pain,” and then get on to the next topic again. If you try to backpedal or explain yourself or in any way hint that you think you’ve “screwed up,” you’re DEAD MEAT. If you say something and she doesn’t like it, that’s not YOUR problem. Women often complain to see if they can manipulate you with their emotions, and when you show you don’t fall for this, her respect and ATTRACTION for you will go through the roof.
Number 2
Hint that you’re normal
There are a lot of psycho, perverted and “mentally unstable” guys out there, so it’s important you communicate through your behavior that you’re NOT one of them. Tell a woman you’re busy, and get off the phone WITHOUT asking her to meet for a date. Make fun of dumb-ass behavior, and other guys who act like wussies. If she calls but doesn’t leave a message, accuse her of being a stalker, and tell her that normal people leave messages. Chase women out of your house; say “get out” over and over again if she’s kissing you. All of this gives her subtle signs that you’re not some freak who desperately wants to get in her pants. This will give her an irresistible craving to get to know you better because you’re so different from the typical needy guys she dates.
Number 1
Use her own games on her
We all know women love playing games. But when you turn the tables and play games on a woman, it shifts the power dynamic in your favor. One of my favorite games to play with women is “You’re a brat, and I’m fake exasperated.” That’s pretty self-explanatory. Some others are “Let’s see who can act the least interested,” and “I’m hard to get, and you love me.” Have fun playing these games with a woman and you’ll soon find that she won’t be able to get enough of your challenging, confident personality.

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